My father was my greatest inspiration. He was a lunatic.

Many people die of thirst but the Irish are born with one.

I'm a hero with coward's legs.

We haven't got a plan so nothing can go wrong!

And God said, 'Let there be light' and there was light, but the Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected.

On the Ning Nang Nong Where the Cows go Bong! And the Monkeys all say Boo! Theres a Nang Nong Ning Where the trees go Ping! And the tea pots Jibber Jabber Joo On the Nong Ning Nang All the Mice go Clang! And you just cant catch em when they do! So its Ning Nang Nong! Cows go Bong! Nong Nang Ning! Trees go Ping! Nong Ning Nang! The mice go Clang! What a noisy place to belong,Is the Ning Nang Ning Nang Nong!

There is a time to live, a time to die, a time to laugh, and at no time are the three of them very far apart.