Truthiness is what you want the facts to be as opposed to what the facts are. What feels like the right answer as opposed to what reality will support.

If our Founding Fathers wanted us to care about the rest of the world, they wouldn't have declared their independence from it.

TV's Tony Snow becomes the White House press secretary. How will he make the difficult transition from Fox News reporter to Republican apologist? ... Mr. President, it is time to hire the folks who've never let you down. Limbaugh at Health and Human Services. Hannity at State. Then give Rummy the Medal of Freedom and install Bill O'Reilly as secretary of defense. Only problem, you might find yourself invading Vermont. And I'll replace Chertoff at Homeland Security. The man's done nothing to control the bear population.

What does Karl Marx put on his pasta? Communist Manipesto!

It warps the minds of our children and weakens the resolve of our allies.

There's nothing wrong with being gay. I have plenty of friends who are going to hell.

Atheism: the religion devoted to the worship of one's own smug sense of superiority.