Electricity is of two kinds, positive and negative. The difference is, I presume, that one comes a little more expensive, but is more durable; the other is a cheaper thing, but the moths get into it.

About the only good thing you can say about old age is, it's better than being dead!

When actors begin to think, it's time for a change. They are not fitted for it.

Most people can tire of a lecture in fifteen minutes, clever people can do it in five, and sensible people don't go to lectures at all.

Golf may be played on Sunday, not being a game within the view of the law, but being a form of moral effort.

It may be those who do most, dream most.

The student of arithmetic who has mastered the first four rules of his art, and successfully striven with money sums and fractions, finds himself confronted by an unbroken expanse of questions known as problems.