If I were founding a university I would begin with a smoking room; next a dormitory; and then a decent reading room and a library. After that, if I still had more money that I couldn't use, I would hire a professor and get some text books.
Stephen LeacockThe classics are only primitive literature. They belong to the same class as primitive machinery and primitive music and primitive medicine.
Stephen LeacockThe landlady of a boarding-house is a parallelogram - that is, an oblong angular figure, which cannot be described, but which is equal to anything
Stephen Leacock