Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one?
Last week I forgot how to ride a bicycle.
I feel lucky that I can have people laugh solidly for a whole hour by just saying what I think and getting paid for it.
All those who believe in psychokinesis - raise my hand.
I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving.
I collect rare photographs... I have two... One of Houdini locking his keys in his car... the other is a rare picture of Norman Rockwell beating up a child.