I just got out of the hospital. I was in a speed-reading accident. I hit a bookmark.
I took a course in speed reading. Then I got Reader's Digest on microfilm. By the time I got the machine set up, I was done.
All of the people in my building are insane. The guy above me designs synthetic hairballs for ceramic cats.
Did you sleep well?" "No, I made a couple of mistakes.
I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.
I got my driver's license photo taken out of focus on purpose. Now when I get pulled over, the cop looks at it [moving it nearer and farther, trying to see it clearly], and says, "Here, you can go"