Real life? Well, I just hope mine isn't investigated. They might find that I don't really exist - that I'm just a hologram.

How come Superman could stop bullets with his chest, but always ducked when someone threw a gun at him?

It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to have to paint it.

Is it weird in here, or is it just me?

Good jokes are gems. A good idea is hard to come by. I couldn't give them to someone else, even for money. It just wouldn't seem right.

I like George Carlin's jokes. I like his humor. He's one of my heroes, and I like what he did with talking about everyday things.

My friend Sam has one leg. I went to his house. I couldn't go up the stairs.