You know the old joke, I went to the fights and a hockey game broke out.

It's like the Wild West, the Internet. There are no rules.

I love eating chocolate cake and ice cream after a show. I almost justify it in my mind as, 'You were a good boy onstage and you did your show, so now you can have some cake and ice cream.'

Smoking cures weight problems, eventually.

It usually helps me write by reading - somehow the reading gear in your head turns the writing gear.

I paint; I draw and paint - I've been doing that since I was in third grade, drawing realistically and then changing to abstract art. That was my first creative thing before guitar or comedy.

Yesterday I told a chicken to cross the road. It said, "What for?"