I was once walking through the forest alone. A tree fell right in front of me - and I didn't hear it.

Last year we drove across the country...We had one cassette tape to listen to on the entire trip... I don't remember what it was.

Officer, I know I was going faster than 55MPH, but I wasn't going to be on the road an hour.

My secret to staying young... Having no sense of time.

If God dropped acid, would he see people?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard? Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

It was the first time I was ever in love, and I learned a lot. Before that I'd never even thought about killing myself.