I went to this restaurant last night that was set up like a big buffet in the shape of an Ouija board. You'd think about what kind of food you want, and the table would move across the floor to it.

I was once arrested for resisting arrest.

Last week I forgot how to ride a bicycle.

I had to stop driving my car for a while... the tires got dizzy.

I think God's going to come down and pull civilization over for speeding.

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?

If I melt dry ice, can I swim without getting wet?