The sky already fell. Now what?

They say the universe is expanding. That should help with the traffic.

I used to work at a health food store. I got fired for drinking straight Bosco on the job.

I got a chain letter by fax. It's very simple. You just fax a dollar bill to everybody on the list.

Why do banks charge you a "non-sufficient funds fee" on money they already know you don't have?

So I got off the plane and I forget to take off my seat-belt and I'm dragging the plane through the terminal... The wings are knocking people over.

99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.