You know when you're sitting on a chair and you lean back so you're just on two legs and you lean too far so you almost fall over but at the last second you catch yourself? I feel like that all the time.

If you are sending someone some Styrofoam, what do you pack it in?

Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

I wear my heart on my sleeve. I wear my liver on my pant leg.

I think God's going to come down and pull civilization over for speeding.

The older you get, the more you learn to see what you've been taught to see. When you're a kid, you see what's there.

Yeah, but I don't believe everything I read.