Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?

Doing a little work around the house. I put fake brick wallpaper over a real brick wall, just so I'd be the only one who knew. People come over and I'm gonna say, "Go ahead, touch it... it feels real."

I have a large sea shell collection which I keep scattered on beaches all over the world. Maybe you've seen it.

The Stones, I love the Stones. I watch them whenever I can. Fred, Barney.

The sky already fell. Now what?

I'm used to seeing it, but it's weird having an Academy Award. You usually only see one of them on the TV show when they give them out, so it's kind of surreal to have one in your house.

I put tape on the mirrors in my house so I don't accidentally walk through into another dimension.