I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place.

When I erase a word with a pencil, where does it go?

How do you tell when you’re out of invisible ink?

I stayed in a really old hotel last night. They sent me a wake-up letter.

If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.

I planted some bird seed. A bird came up. Now I don’t know what to feed it.

Only one in four jokes ever works, and I still can't predict what people will laugh at.