Why buy a product that it takes 2000 flushes to get rid of?
If a man says something in the woods and there are no women there, is he still wrong?
My friend has a baby. I'm recording all the noises he makes so later I can ask him what he meant.
I once tried to commit suicide by jumping off a building...I changed my mind at the last minute, so I just flipped over and landed on my feet. Two little kittens nearby saw what happened and one turns to the other and says, "See, that's how it's done."
Isn't the best way to save face to keep the lower part shut?
The lady across the hall tried to rob a department store . . . with a pricing gun. She said, "Give me all of the money in the vault, or I'm marking down everything in the store."