Isn't the best way to save face to keep the lower part shut?

You know when you're sitting on a chair and you lean back so you're just on two legs and you lean too far so you almost fall over but at the last second you catch yourself? I feel like that all the time.

I have a fax machine with "fax waiting".

I poured spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.

When I was five years old I was on a merry go round. There was a gunshot nearby. The horses stampeded. There I was running down the street on a purple wooden horse.

Very rarely do I talk off the top of my head on stage. I'm not an improv guy. I'm a writer-guy who presents what he's written.

If a mute kid swears, should his mother wash his hands with soap?