Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time.

I Xeroxed a mirror. Now I have an extra Xerox machine.

My friend has a baby. I'm recording all the noises he makes so later I can ask him what he meant.

I got an answering machine for my phone. . . . Now, when I'm not home and somebody calls me up . . . they hear a recording of a busy signal.

For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier... I put them in the same room and let them fight it out.

You know how it is when you're reading a book and falling asleep, you're reading, reading... and all of a sudden you notice your eyes are closed? I'm like that all the time.

If Dracula can't see his reflection in a mirror, how come his hair is always so neatly combed?