When I was 16... I worked in a pet store. And they fired me because... they had three snakes in there, and one day I braided them.
How do you get off a non-stop flight?
Laughing stock: cattle with a sense of humor.
How come Superman could stop bullets with his chest, but always ducked when someone threw a gun at him?
Yeah, but I don't believe everything I read.
My girlfriend does her nails with white-out. When she's asleep, I go over there and write misspelled words on them.