One time a cop pulled me over for running a stop sign. He said, "Didn't you see the stop sign?" I said, "Yeah, but I don't believe everything I read"

Drugs may lead to nowhere, but at least it's the scenic route.

I intend to live forever. So far, so good.

There's something about being in front of a live audience that's fun. It's a really interesting, very electric, very alive, and intense experience, and you can't get it anywhere else. And I've been doing it since I was 23, so it's part of my being - it's part of my fabric as a person.

On the other hand, you have different fingers.

I'm not afraid of heights. I'm afraid of widths.

I'm so hyper. (said with a very dull voice>