How many people does it take to change a searchlight bulb?

There was a power outage at a department store yesterday. Twenty people were trapped on the escalators.

A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths.

I like to go to art museums and name the untitled paintings... Boy With Pail... Kitten On Fire.

I put tape on the mirrors in my house so I don't accidentally walk through into another dimension.

Today I dialed a wrong number... The other person said, "Hello?" and I said, "Hello, could I speak to Joey?"... They said, "Uh... I don't think so... he's only 2 months old." I said, "I'll wait."

The severity of the itch is proportional to the reach.