If one synchronised swimmer drowns, do all the rest have to drown too?

A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.

When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

I've always had to conquer fear when I'm on stage. Basically, I was and still am a very shy person. It's absolutely in conflict with what I do. But once I deliver the first joke I'm okay. It's like I'm out there all by myself just delivering my lines to nobody in particular without ever trying to notice the audience in front of me.

Why do we put suits in a garment bag and put garments in a suitcase?

I hate it when my leg falls asleep. I know that means it's going to be up all night.

I was in a grocery store. I saw a sign that said 'pet supplies.' So I did. Then I went outside and saw a sign that said, 'Compact cars.