I can't stop thinking like this.

I wish, when I was first born, the first thing I said was "Quote" so the last thing I said before I died would be "Unquote.

When I was in boy scouts, I slipped on the ice and hurt my ankle. A little old lady had to help me across the street.

It usually helps me write by reading - somehow the reading gear in your head turns the writing gear.

The speed of time is one second per second.

I got a garage door opener. It can't close. Just open.

A friend of mine is into Voodoo Acupuncture. You don't have to go. You'll just be walking down the street and . . . ooooohhhhhh, that's much better.