I saw a sign: "Rest Area 25 Miles". That's pretty big. Some people must be really tired.

The severity of the itch is proportional to the reach.

Hermits have no peer pressure.

Do you think that when they asked George Washington for ID that he just whipped out a quarter?

I went camping and borrowed a circus tent by mistake. I didn't notice until I got it set up. People complained because they couldn't see the lake.

For a while I didn't have a car . . . I had a helicopter . . . no place to park it, so I just tied it to a lamp post and left it running. [slow glance upward]

I was born by Caesarian section . . . but not so you'd notice. It's just that when I leave a house, I go out through the window.