If you tell a joke in the forest, but nobody laughs, was it a joke?

Drugs may lead to nowhere, but at least it's the scenic route.

Why is the third hand on a watch called a second hand?

When I was a kid I had a friend who worked in a radio station. Whenever we walked under a bridge, you couldn't hear what he said.

Why do we wait until a pig is dead to "cure" it?

Today I dialed a wrong number... The other person said, "Hello?" and I said, "Hello, could I speak to Joey?"... They said, "Uh... I don't think so... he's only 2 months old." I said, "I'll wait."

Imagine Pulitzer prizefighting.