If you tell a joke in the forest, but nobody laughs, was it a joke?

I forgot and left the lighthouse on all night. Next day the sun wouldn't rise.

What do you do when you see an endangered animal that eats only endangered plants?

Can you buy an entire chess set in a pawn shop?

You know how it is when you’re walking up the stairs, and you get to the top, and you think there’s one more step? I’m like that all the time.

Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect.

When I was crossing the border into Canada, they asked if I had any firearms with me. I said, 'Well, what do you need?'