How come you don't ever hear about gruntled employees? And who has been dis-ing them anyhow?
I hate it when my leg falls asleep. I know that means it's going to be up all night.
I was reading the dictionary. I thought it was a poem about everything.
Imagine Oshkosh straitjackets for little insane children.
I saw a subliminal advertising executive, but only for a second.
My girlfriend's weird. One day she asked me, 'If you could know how and when you were going to die, would you want to know?' I said, 'No.' She said, 'Okay, forget it.