I was hitchhiking the other day and a hearse stopped. I said, 'No thanks, I'm not going that far.
Why, in a country of free speech, are there phone bills?
Everyone has a photographic Memory, some just don't have film.
When I was a kid I had a friend who worked in a radio station. Whenever we walked under a bridge, you couldn't hear what he said.
I took a lie detector test the other day. No, I didn't.
I took a course in speed reading. Then I got Reader's Digest on microfilm. By the time I got the machine set up, I was done.