You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard? Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Smoking cures weight problems, eventually.
I was born. When I was 23 I started telling jokes. Then I started going on television and doing films. That's still what I am doing. The end.
My friend Sam has one leg. I went to his house. I couldn't go up the stairs.
I need one of those baby monitors from my subconscious to my consciousness so I can know what the hell I'm really thinking about.