Why do you press harder on a remote-control when you know the battery's dead?

My nephew has HDADHD. High Definition Attention Deficit Disorder. He can barely pay attention, but when he does it's unbelievably clear.

When I was a kid, I never did funny things to get attention. I was never a funny person. I was never, like, 'Oh, wow. I could say this some day on stage.'

The other day I ... no wait, that wasn't me.

I have a large sea shell collection which I keep scattered on beaches all over the world. Maybe you've seen it.

I went to San Francisco. I found someone’s heart.

I went to a restaurant that serves 'breakfast at any time'. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.