I like to fill my tub up with water, then turn the shower on and act like I'm in a submarine that's been hit .

Laughing stock: cattle with a sense of humor.

Black holes result from God dividing the universe by zero.

Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?

Because I don't believe everything I read.

I washed a sock. Then I put it in the dryer. When I took it out, it was gone.

My theory of evolution is that Darwin was adopted.