Because I don't believe everything I read.

I bought my brother some gift-wrap for Christmas. I took it to the gift wrap department and told them to wrap it, but in a different print so he would know when to stop unwrapping.

Should you trust a stockbroker who's married to a travel agent?

If you were going to shoot a mime, would you use a silencer?

I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet. So I said, "Got any shoes you’re not using?

In a lot of ways, success is much harder than I thought it would be. I figured that you'd get here and then everything would be happily ever after. But, it's hard work, almost harder once you're successful because you've got to maintain it.

I saw a vegetarian wearing a furry coat. so I looked closer. it was made of grass.