Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

My friend has a baby. I'm recording all the noises he makes so later I can ask him what he meant.

I collect rare photographs... I have two... One of Houdini locking his keys in his car... the other is a rare picture of Norman Rockwell beating up a child.

When I erase a word with a pencil, where does it go?

I was in the supermarket the other day, and I met a lady in the aisle where they keep the generic brands. Her name was 'woman.

I live at the end of a dead end one way street. I don't know how I got there.

Why do we put suits in a garment bag and put garments in a suitcase?