I stayed in a really old hotel last night. They sent me a wake-up letter.
How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn’t live there?
Be nice to your children. After all, they are going to choose your nursing home.
To me, comedy is just twisting reality. It's commenting or observing or twisting life.
Is it possible to be totally partial?
There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.