If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?
I broke my arm trying to fold a bed. It wasn't the kind that folds.
Doing stand-up is like running across a frozen pond with the ice breaking behind you. I love it because it's dangerous.
Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories.
I play the harmonica. The only way I can play is if I get my car going really fast, and stick it out the window.
I had just received my degree in Calcium Anthropology... the study of milkmen.