If you were going to shoot a mime, would you use a silencer?

I remember when the candle shop burned down. Everyone stood around singing 'Happy Birthday.'

I'm seeing the world partially through the eyes of a kid. Not all the time. There's no black and white to it. But sometimes I'm seeing it like I'm 4.

I made a chocolate cake with white chocolate. Then I took it to a potluck. I stood in line for some cake. They said, "Do you want white cake or chocolate cake?" I said, "yes."

If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?

When I was a little kid we had a sand box. It was a quicksand box. I was an only child... eventually.

I bought a dog the other day. . . . I named him Stay. It's fun to call him. . . . "Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!" He went insane. Now he just ignores me and keeps typing.