If you were going to shoot a mime, would you use a silencer?

My grandfather gave me a watch. It doesn't have any hands or numbers. He says it's very accurate. I asked him what time it was. You can guess what he told me.

Why do you press harder on a remote-control when you know the battery's dead?

I bought my brother some gift-wrap for Christmas. I took it to the gift wrap department and told them to wrap it, but in a different print so he would know when to stop unwrapping.

In Vegas, I got into a long argument with the man at the roulette wheel over what I considered to be an odd number.

My friend has a baby. I'm recording all the noises he makes so later I can ask him what he meant.

I named my dog Stay, so I can say, 'Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!