Do married people live longer than single people or does it just SEEM longer?

Snakes have no arms. That's why they don't wear vests.

I like to skate on the other side of the ice.

I've always had to conquer fear when I'm on stage. Basically, I was and still am a very shy person. It's absolutely in conflict with what I do. But once I deliver the first joke I'm okay. It's like I'm out there all by myself just delivering my lines to nobody in particular without ever trying to notice the audience in front of me.

I have two pairs of reading glasses. One pair is for reading fiction, the other for non-fiction. I've read the Bible twice wearing each pair, and it's the same.

Why are they called buildings when they’re already finished? Shouldn’t they be called builts?

When I die, I'm leaving my body to science fiction.