They say the universe is expanding. That should help with the traffic.
I Xeroxed a mirror. Now I have an extra Xerox machine.
If heat rises, then heaven must be hotter than hell
People think my friend George is weird because he wears sideburns...behind his ears. I think he's weird because he wears false teeth...with braces on them.
I stayed in a really old hotel last night. They sent me a wake-up letter.
I got a new shadow. I had to get rid of the other one – it wasn’t doing what I was doing.