Day 1 -- Still tired from the move. Day 2 -- Everybody talks to me like I'm an idiot.

Is 'tired old cliché' one?

I have a fax machine with "fax waiting".

I play the harmonica. The only way I can play is if I get my car going really fast, and stick it out the window.

You know what scares me? When you have to be nice to some paranoid schizophrenic, just because she lives in your head.

When I was a kid, I never did funny things to get attention. I was never a funny person. I was never, like, 'Oh, wow. I could say this some day on stage.'

It doesn't matter what temperature the room is, it's always room temperature.