I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles.
Steven WrightMy mother is from another time - the funniest person to her is Lucille Ball; that's what she loves. A lot of times she tells me she doesn't know what I'm talking about. I know if I wasn't her son and she was flipping through the TV and saw me, she would just keep going.
Steven Wright