All those who believe in psychokinesis - raise my hand.

I have a quantum car. Every time I look at the speedometer I get lost.

My mother is from another time - the funniest person to her is Lucille Ball; that's what she loves. A lot of times she tells me she doesn't know what I'm talking about. I know if I wasn't her son and she was flipping through the TV and saw me, she would just keep going.

All the plants in my house are dead - I shot them last night. I was teasing them by watering them with ice cubes.

The other day I went to a tourist information booth and asked, 'Tell me about some of the people who were here last year.

I can't stop thinking like this.

I went to a general store but they wouldn't let me buy anything specific.