I wish the first word I ever said was the word "quote", so right before I die I could say "unquote".
Laughing stock: cattle with a sense of humor.
Isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?
I got food poisoning today. I don't know when I'll use it.
I invented the cordless extension cord.
What do you do when you see an endangered animal that eats only endangered plants?