In my house on the ceilings I have paintings of the rooms above... so I never have to go upstairs.

I like to fill my tub up with water, then turn the shower on and act like I'm in a submarine that's been hit .

I got this powdered water - now I don't know what to add.

You know how it is when you go to be the subject of a psychology experiment and nobody else shows up and you think maybe that's part of the experiment? I'm like that all the time.

Should you trust a stockbroker who's married to a travel agent?

My grandfather gave me a watch. It doesn't have any hands or numbers. He says it's very accurate. I asked him what time it was. You can guess what he told me.

Last year we drove across the country...We had one cassette tape to listen to on the entire trip... I don't remember what it was.