I look like a casual, laid-back guy, but it's like a circus in my head.

I went to the hardware store to buy some batteries, but they weren't included, so I had to buy them again.

I changed my headlights the other day. I put in strobe lights instead! Now when I drive at night, it looks like everyone else is standing still.

Doing a little work around the house. I put fake brick wallpaper over a real brick wall, just so I'd be the only one who knew. People come over and I'm gonna say, "Go ahead, touch it... it feels real."

I have not lost my mind - it's backed up on disk somewhere.

Day One: Still tired from the move.

Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?