I recently went to the hardware store and I bought some used paint... it was in a shape of a house. I also bought some batteries, but they weren't included. So I had to buy them again.

I saw a tree fall in the woods, and I didn't hear it.

Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7 of your life.

I had just received my degree in Calcium Anthropology... the study of milkmen.

Isn't the best way to save face to keep the lower part shut?

I named my dog Stay, so I can say, 'Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!

How can there be self-help groups?