Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect.

Five out of four people have trouble with fractions.

The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.

Yesterday I told a chicken to cross the road. It said, "What for?"

I am writing a book. So far I have the pages numbered.

I was thinking that women should put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans.

I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet. So I said, "Got any shoes you’re not using?