A friend of mine drowned in a bowl of muesli. A strong currant pulled him in.
I used to be indecisive but now I am not quite sure
Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.
So I rang up a local building firm, I said 'I want a skip outside my house.' He said 'I'm not stopping you.'
I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn’t find any.
Last night I dreamt I ate a ten pound marshmallow. When I woke up the pillow was gone.