Went to the paper shop - it had blown away.

Went to the corner shop - bought 4 corners.

Man went into a bar, he only had one arm. Guy sitting next to him said 'Hey, you've got your sleeve in my drink', man replied, 'There's no arm in it'

A man walked into the doctor's, The doctor said 'I haven't seen you in a long time' The man replied, 'I know I've been ill'.

So a man jumps into a taxi and says "King Arthur's close" and the taxi driver says, "don't worry we'll lose him at the next lights".

I always sit in the tail end of a plane, always. You never hear of an plane backing into a mountain.

I backed horse last week at ten to one. It came in at quarter past four.