So a lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a train-load of terrapins, I thought "That's a turtle disaster".
Tommy CooperTwo Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly; but when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank, proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.
Tommy CooperA policeman stopped me and said: Would you please blow into this bag, sir? I said: What for, officer? He said: My chips are too hot.
Tommy CooperDoctor, I can't pronounce my F's, T's and H's.โ โWell you can't say fairer than that then
Tommy Cooper