At some point in their life, everyone thinks they should go to law school. You may in fact think you want to go to law school now.

Due to the potent combination of my sexual recklessness and the slutty nature of some of the girls I have slept with, I have accumulated enough stories and anecdotes about abortion that they could name a Planned Parenthood clinic after me.

Yes, the road to hell is paved with good intentions, but everyone forgets the second half of that quote: the road to heaven is paved with good actions.

I stop paying attention because as much as I love beauty, I hate stupidity, and seeing the two combined pisses me off.

Gotta love alcohol and sex hormones.

Critics stopped being relevant when they stopped writing to inform and contextualize, and when they started writing to signal who they are, to display their identity by their stance on what they are writing about. Criticism should never be about the critic, but thats what it has become, and that’s why no one cares about them anymore.

You play crotch roulette, you're gonna hit double zero once in a while.