It (the double-clarinet in India) was primarily used for snake charming, since the snake would do almost anything to get the Indians to stop playing it.

If I have caused just one person to wipe away a tear of laughter, that's my reward.

In my youth, I wanted to be a great pantomimist -- but I found I had nothing to say.

...the elephant smoked too much.

Read (this book), smile, enjoy, and if you happen to learn something along the way, don't get upset.

I normally don't do requests. Unless, of course, I have been asked to do so.

When an opera star sings her head off? she usually improves her appearance.