Humor is something that thrives between man's aspirations and his limitations. There is more logic in humor than in anything else. Because, you see, humor is truth.

Beethoven wrote in three flats a lot. That's because he moved twice.

A Smile is a curve which can set a lot of things straight.

Always remember to forget the things that made you sad, but never forget to remember the things that made you glad.

I only know two pieces; one is 'Clair de Lune' and the other one isn't.

I don't mind going back to daylight saving time. With inflation, the hour will be the only thing I've saved all year.

And now, in honour of the 150th anniversary of Beethoven's death, I would like to play 'Clear the Saloon', er, 'Clair de Lune', by Debussy. I don't play Beethoven so well, but I play Debussy very badly, and Beethoven would have liked that.