In my youth, I wanted to be a great pantomimist -- but I found I had nothing to say.
When an opera star sings her head off? she usually improves her appearance.
The elephant smoked too much.(explaining why the keys of his piano were so yellow)
I don't mind going back to daylight saving time. With inflation, the hour will be the only thing I've saved all year.
The difference between a violin and a viola is that a viola burns longer.
One afternoon, when I was four years old, my father came home, and he found me in the living room in front of a roaring fire, which made him very angry. Because we didn't have a fireplace.